I’m writing this late at night, awake due to a nasty cold, and feeling pretty darn discouraged. So if this post is a bit rambly, that’s why.
I’m ending my social media hiatus* a week early. And it’s not because I’m done revising. Because I’m not. Not even close.
Don’t get me wrong, I got a TON of work done these last few weeks – way more than I probably would have otherwise.
As I’ve been tackling these revisions, I’ve realized that this is turning into much, much more than smoothing sentences and changing a few things here and there. I mean, I knew that, but for some reason the magnitude of it still hadn’t sunk in until today. I have a bunch of new scenes that I still need to add. I’m also still not solid with how I want to fix my ending. I have several chapters that are so messed up they’re going to need to be completely overhauled. In other words, this is going to take a heck of a lot more time than I thought**, and I’ve been working on it pretty much constantly throughout the day, everyday, and today my brain hit a wall and I couldn’t do more than a paragraph, and I realized I’m really close to burning out. And that’s a lot of “ands.”
When my revision notes turn into a string of curses (yeah, that happened today. I’m not proud of it, but it felt good), it’s probably time to slow down a bit.
That’s the beauty of self-imposed deadlines. I’m the only one depending on me to finish, so I can push that deadline back without it affecting anyone else. This is my first book. It’s a HUGE learning curve. This is the book where I figure out how I work. It’s where I learn my lessons. It’s where… ok, you get it.
And you know what else? I want to ENJOY this time. I want to have FUN with these revisions. Because someday, hopefully, if I’m lucky, I’ll have REAL deadlines hanging over my head and THAT will be the appropriate time to stress. Right now, I can choose my stress level, and I choose to turn that knob to low again.
So what I’m saying is, I could finish out this last week of my sort-of-kind-of social media hiatus – I know I could because I’ve done it for two weeks already – but what would be the point? I miss everyone. I miss getting support and giving it. So yes, I could do it. But I don’t want to.
I’m back. Hi! I missed you!
* OK, I did pop on Twitter and Facebook a few times – just a few. And I’ve been on Tumblr (initially for writing inspiration, but let’s face it, who can resist a funny Sherlock gif or two…or three…or, hey look, some Dr. Who stuff, and…..ANYWAY, it still wasn’t TOO distracting and I still got a lot done. Mostly I’ve been pretty good.
** I’ve said this before, haven’t I? Yup, several times, I think. Maybe I can learn something from this?